Sandra Gayle Carey

Sandra Gayle (Statler) Carey, daughter of Herbert P. Statler and Freda M. (Holsinger) Statler, died peacefully on the morning of July 15, 2024 in Falls Church, VA. Sandy is survived by her daughter Leslie E. Carey and son Jason A. Carey, her daughter-in-law Katherine A. (Walther) Carey, and her grandchildren Deirdre M. Buckmaster, Liam X. Carey, and Samantha J. Carey.

Sandy’s family has deep roots in Pennsylvania. Her German ancestors arrived in the early 1700s, living in what was then the frontier in the western part of the state. Her ancestor Rebecca Walter lived with Native Americans when she was young; she returned home after a decade, married a childhood friend, Casper Statler, and lived to age 90.

Sandy loved growing up in western Pennsylvania, in a small town called Central City, where she spent her time playing outdoors, studying the wonders of nature, surreptitiously reading late into the night with a flashlight under her covers or in her closet, and enjoying her mother’s pies and cream puffs. By the time she reached high school, Sandy was a driven and ambitious child. At Shade High School, she was president of her class and the co-editor (with her close friend Irene Seasack) of the school newspaper, “The Shadearrow.” She was popular among the student body, attending dances and sewing her own dashing prom dresses. She graduated as the valedictorian of her class.

Sandy was always a proud feminist, so she set her sights on college and an independent career. She attended Dickinson College (class of 1959), where she majored in Psychology and became famous for spilling tea on Robert Frost. Then she headed to New York City, where she lived from 1959 to 1963, working at Equitable Life and living on the Upper East Side. The Big Apple and the New York Yankees were two of her great loves for the rest of her days.

In 1962, she married Robert G. Carey – once in a Catholic ceremony in New York and a second time in a Lutheran ceremony in Central City – and they moved to Wilmington, DE in 1963. After moving to Wilmington, she became a school teacher. Sandy and Bob had two children, Leslie in 1971 and Jason in 1974. Her marriage ended in divorce in 1974, leaving her to raise two young children on her own. Her mother Freda later moved to Wilmington from Irwin, PA to help.

After the divorce, Sandy studied to become a dentist but wasn’t able to complete the coursework while caring for her young children, so she returned to teaching. In 1980 she became a school teacher at St. Helena’s Catholic school, where she taught for over 30 years. She was a dedicated and beloved teacher, primarily in the 7th and 8th grades. She taught until age 74.

Sandy’s family loved her magical holidays – especially Thanksgiving, Christmas, and family birthdays – which she joyously celebrated with a large spread of food, glittering candles, and abundant decorations. Every summer, she also hosted a wonderful family vacation in Rehoboth Beach, DE (which may have just edged out New York as her favorite place in the world).

Sandy had the very biggest of hearts, and always included Bob and his partner Beverly K. Ford in those family celebrations and beach trips. As a result, she gave her children and
grandchildren the extraordinary gift of a large, warm, and loving family.

When Deirdre was born in 1999, Sandy took great joy in being a foundational caregiver for her first grandchild. Although distance did not allow her to play the same role with Liam and Samantha, she adored them and they adored her right back. Her last decade of life was spent doting on her grandchildren and enjoying a slower pace of life – spending time with Vonnie, Daisy, Joe, and her many friends from St. Helena’s; having backyard beer and wine parties with her neighbors Bob, Matt, and Dawn; working in her garden; doing daily crossword puzzles; following the intricacies of politics along with Rachel Maddow; making holiday meals with family; rediscovering her love of birds and nature; and, of course, rooting for her New York Yankees.

Sandy was dearly loved and will be greatly missed.

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